To be heard and paid attention to

I was a mental health counselor for a year while in graduate school. And the most common piece of gratitude I got from clients... "thank you for listening".

I really believe being heard is important to emotional and mental health. Really important. And when a person doesn't get really good listening from family and friends... it negatively impacts their self-worth.

I've got a friend who shows me how much he values what I have to say. If I'm interrupted by someone, he will come back to me and go "So, you were saying...". That shows me he values what I have to say. And when that happens, the wave of "I matter to someone" washes over me. I feel like he wants to be part of my life... the experience and existence of Jeffrey.

Being paid attention to... being heard... it validates my existence. And I believe that is very important to one's self-worth. I want more people in my life who validate my existence by paying attention to me. I'm not looking for therapists or counselors or people to solve my problems. And I'm not looking for people who point out what's wrong with me by telling me to get exercise or talk to someone else or whatever. I have enough of that already.

I want people who pay attention to me simply because they want to know who I am and be part of my life and have me be part of theirs. That's what I believe when someone pays attention to me. That the people who pay attention want to be part of my life and that those who don't pay attention - don't care enough.